My booty is big and my pants don't fit.

My booty is big and my pants don't fit.

I am one of those people who have been blessed. Bless with thinness. Blessed with a moderate appetite and a love of exercise. I am just totally beyond blessed. If you want to unfollow or unfriend me because of my blessedness, please do.

For the past year I have been attending cross-fit, and running like crazy. It helps keep my depression at bay, and I really love it. I love the people I have these adventures with. I love the feeling of doing something out of the ordinary. I love the simplicity of running and the way my breath matches the rhythm of my steps. I love having the goal of a race on the horizon while I face the mundane tasks of life. I love going to cross-fit in the mornings and doing crazy workouts I never think I can do. But my movement has consequences. It seems that all of this incessant movement of the glutes has developed them into larger than proportionate items on my backside. The look like the nubs on an acorn squash that grew and grew to monstrous proportions.

Pants don't fit well. So, I like wearing skirts and dresses. But, for my home floor sanding jobs, I need pants, and my jeans are too snug. I wanted to purchase new jeans, so I went to several stores but they all looked dumb. The waist is too big if it fits the hip region, or I can't get the pants on. I was about to give up and just have stretchy pants eternally until I tried on some capris at Walmart. Who knew Walmart would be the place to find enough spandex for the toosh and legs, with a waist that I could belt up and look pretty OK in. Oh yeah.... my thighs are growing too.  While they are not quite keeping up with the booty, they are trying.

Here is the thing I wonder. Why doesn't all the cellulite melt away, or hide under the muscles? I just want you to know that even on me, who is totally beyond blessed, it doesn't. Whilst my muscles are growing, the upper crust of cottage-cheese is still floating on the surface right under that skin. Despite the running, and the lifting, and the mostly moderate diet except for ice-cream of which I eat a lot, there is fat. It sort of makes me think that fat is supposed to be there, and I should just find it beautiful. I blame Hollywood for my unrealistic expectations of beauty. And Obama.


Comments

  1. Jennifer ThomasJuly 8, 2016 at 4:21 PM

    You entertain me so. I'll see you and you big booty at school in a month...Enjoy the rest of your summer and your Walmart capris! :-)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Jennifer ThomasJuly 8, 2016 at 4:22 PM

    You entertain me so. I'll see you and you big booty at school in a month...Enjoy the rest of your summer and your Walmart capris! :-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sharee GarietyJuly 12, 2016 at 10:04 PM

    Haha! Evelyn! I love you. And even though you are beyond blessed, I would never unfriend you. Great job on all your working out awesomeness which has resulted in growing a fantastic booty. And I'm glad you found some pants that can handle your backside. ;)

    ReplyDelete

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