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Showing posts from November, 2014

The Artist Painted Moi

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How did you get an artist to paint you? Well there are 5 easy breezy steps. Step 1: Meet an artist. Several would be better, because in my experience you have to ask three artists to get one to paint you. Meeting an artist who paints portraits would be even better. Step 2: Show admiration for the artists work. Step 3: Ask the artist if they would paint you. Step 4: They will say yes. But they might not actually mean yes. Step 5 : Show up at their door so they have pressure to get arting. It is a great question. I know kings and queens have portraits painted. But they are rich. So, how does a mere peasant in this great big world find an artist, and then get that artist to agree to paint them. How much does such a luxury even cost: 50 candy bars? One thousand candy bars? I have to admit, this is not the first artist I have asked to paint me. Ian has an aunt who is an artist, and I mentioned I would love to model for a painting. My aunt Karina is also an artist, and I have

I'm on vacation, 5 minutes from my house

Hello bloggity readers. It is nice to chat with you this evening from my motel room. I am munching on sugar daddies, eating popcorn, and sipping on ice water. I am, you see, on vacation. I decided I needed vacation yesterday when my three year old took the can of hot chocolate from off the counter and spread it all over the basement. The basement has carpet. The can of hot chocolate was pretty much full. The vacuum cleaner tried hard, but that chocolate powder is probably going to live in my basement carpet forever. "Ian, I am getting a motel room tomorrow night and I am staying there by myself." That was what I said to Ian on the phone yesterday afternoon. "Ok. Sounds fun." That is how I know my husband loves me and gets me. So, here I am. At the Best Western in Sidney. I chose the Best Western because it has a hot tub. I decided to bring my 7 year old with me. Because even though I like to be alone, I like to be alone with people. We checked into our ho

Alexander Movie Review. The Title is really too long, so I won't write it.

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I went to this 7:00 o'clock movie with my 8 year old daughter as well as the movie gals. That was the best choice I made all day. The movie had Jennifer Gardner in it. I know she says her name is Jennifer Garner, but I prefer to think of her as a Gardener who grows lilies, and Gardner is pretty close. Jennifer is adorable. Ever since "13 Going On 30" she has captured a place in my heart. I watched "13 Going on 30" a lot when I was living in Beijing, and the people in the movies were the only people who spoke English, and they were my best friends. Mark Ruffalo and Jennifer Gardner are dear friends of mine, but they don't know me. That is fine, because I don't know if I would like the reality as well as the fantasy people I've created in my head. Well, in Alexander and the Horrible, Terrible, No Good, Very Bad Day (or is it Terrible, Horrible? which is a very, very long name for a movie. I actually think that movies should have names that peopl

The Danger and Delight of Scholastic Bookordering

My kids bring home these wonderful, dangerous, delightful things in their backpacks every month. I've loved them ever since I was a kid. Scholastic Bookorder forms. They say "Open a world of possible." I think it should be possibility, but I appreciate the brevity. I get 3 of them. Bookorder forms. Paper that crinkles, a coupon stapled to the front-one for each child in school. Each order is a colorful wonderland holding age appropriate delights. One month, I spent $50 on the complete collection of Junie B. Jones. That girl is FUNNY.  $50 would buy several candy bars, the true representation of a dollar. When I was little 50 cents would buy a candy bar. That was a luxury I took for granted. When people talk about inflation, I see it in chocolate candy bars. Right now I am looking through the preschool books. I am thinking, How many "David" books are there? I don't know, but I want them all! I want the books where he is in trouble, and where he is st

Why I am Angry at Nicholas Sparks

This is not a tidy movie that ends with a bow on top. It ends with a crane shot of a woman alone on a bench. This is a very untidy movie, not based on a true story, that breaks all the rules of chick-flickery and made me angry. Apparently there is a book. "The Best of Me" Nicholas Sparks wrote the thing, and then someone made a movie based on it, but apparently took some liberties. My friend Meg had read the book, and there in her hoody, shook her head at me when the movie veered from the original story line. Her head shook many times. I am not holding back on spoilers, so read no more if you wish to get angry all by yourself later. Here's the deal. I was into this movie. I was right there with them as they lived their star-crossed lives. The actors were good. The music was well done, and the story line moved along at a pleasant pace. The were was a break-up scene that was the most torturous break-up I've ever beheld. There was a good location that grounded th